I got my first look at NAS Whiting Field today. It's beautiful.
Pensacola is kind of like the "big city" of bases. It's pretty huge, lots of fancy amenities, lots of buildings. It's a hub. Whiting Field is more picturesque.
Being new to the Navy life, I've only experienced a handful of bases, but of course, I know Pensacola is an exception. Still, I didn't expect so much... green at Whiting. Lots of trees and forest, beautiful wooden fences, landscapers mulching the ground with fresh, red cedar.
I saw the trainer planes and helicopters all lined up in neat orange and white rows, the command building with its white gables. It kind of looked like a resort, which would make anyone in training there laugh until they passed out from lack of oxygen.
Another first. My husband finally let me help him study his EPs (Emergency Procedures). He has to know them by rote, which is difficult considering the sheer number of things that can go wrong with a plane. He knew it would be easier if I helped him, but he didn't ask because he didn't want to "inconvenience" me. I was slack-jawed. Seriously? I LOVE helping him. I LOVE being part of the process. He knows this about me.
You know why he was scared to ask? The Navy. He's heard so many times, from so many officers of all ranks that Primary is a marriage-killer. That your wife will feel ignored. She will whine and complain and think you don't love her. She will resent all you. Then, they turn around and say that you should ask your wife to help you study. Hmmm... Blake's heard so many horror stories of guys' crazy wives that he's on eggshells trying to keep my psyche from falling apart. My psyche is fine, thank you very much.
I felt pretty bad for him. Luckily, it's all sorted out. He was visibly relieved.
It made me think, though...
Wives feeling ignored is unavoidable in the military. I mean, seriously, they're called deployments, but having your husband one room away, nose in a book until 9:00 at night, wanting to be left alone, that sounds harsh.
A lot of guys in flight school are newlyweds, or new to living with their significant other. That alone is enough change to make your head spin. Throw in the fact that your husband is the invisible man, and it probably makes some women go crazy. Honestly? I have little to no sympathy. You must have heard, he must have told you, that it's tough. There are hours and hours of studying and hard work to be put in. After-class time on simulators, night flights, random hours, flight plans. Sorry. That's just the way it is. No amount of complaining will make a difference. It will only hinder his training, which is dangerous.
Go ahead, tell him you miss him and of course, you wish you could spend more time together, but don't guilt him into things he doesn't have time for.
Whew. Okay, off the soap box and back to work.
